I never wore it again

I love shopping, especially when it comes to clothes. Things that give me joy are styling clothes.

But today I have to find a black dress to wear to my brother's funeral. It's not a typical shopping spree. I went with my aunt.

The store was small, not well lit, a little dusty, in a busy marketplace. I wouldn't typically shop here, but today's agenda is: find a black dress for the funeral. The shop owner is oblivious to how this is not a typical day errand. We don't have the energy to haggle or anything.

I don't really care so much for how the dress fits. This doesn't feel real. I feel like a zombie, like I'm watching my own life unfold. For once I have no opinion on what to wear. I didn't even try it on, just assessed the fit with my eyes. My aunt made the payments and we proceeded to the next errand. We didn't have much of a conversation.

Even to date I can't remember that dress. I just know it was black with some lace pattern.

I never wore it again.

How do you pick out an outfit to go bury your loved ones?